Tuesday, April 3, 2012

Texty Text

Texting. It’s a nightmare. I would rather piss my pants while giving a speech in front of GQ models than spend another minute agonizing over texting with a dude. They say that you should wait between 1 and 6 minutes to return a text. Why you might ask? SO YOU DON’T LOOK LIKE YOU DON’T HAVE A LIFE.

Whoa. Caps Lock button got stuck.

1 to 6 minutes? That seems like such a long time to respond, especially if you’ve been waiting 30 minutes for his response. I mean--- uhh--- okay fine. When I like a dude, I am glued to my phone. Every text of “hahaha” or some other random lame convo we’re having is like cocaine. Eh, cocaine may be too strong of a comparison. Like crystal meth. Yeah, that’s more accurate.

You get my point.

I don’t want to wait around “pretending” that I’m busy with something else, when all I really want to do is talk to him. Yes, I could call him and hear his voice but maybe you should stop telling me what to do. You’re not my mom. Or maybe you are. Mom- if you’re reading this stop. Seriously.

The thing about texting is that it’s like passing notes. It’s a little nugget of a secret that only you can see. Well, you and whatever friend you’re forwarding it to so you can dissect every character and period of his less than 20 word message.

The bottom line is that these rules about waiting a certain amount of time to respond are ridiculous. If you like a guy, then who cares? Be super interested in him. Fall crazy hard in love. Just make sure you have unlimited texting.

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