Part
of me is super excited to have kids [in the way future] because they’ll be absolutely
hilarious and adorable. Another part of me thinks that getting a dog might be
the same thing. So I’ve decided to make a pros and cons list for both creatures.
DOGS
Pros
·
They’re
always up for a walk or run
·
They
poop and make direct eye contact with you
·
They
snuggle with you while you watch a movie
·
Dogs
don’t talk during said movie you are watching while you snuggle
·
They
will just listen to you talk about your problems and not interrupt
·
They’re
not a human being
·
They
pull a Whitney Houston and [I] WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUU
Cons
·
They
don’t understand you when you talk about your problems
·
They
beg for food like a homeless person or child
·
I
don’t have one right now
KIDS
Pros
·
They
are an instant conversation starter
·
Your
mom will get off your back about producing grandchildren
·
You
have something to blame for not having any money
·
You
can blame pretty much anything on them
·
You
don’t have to get them neutered in the first year of their life
Cons
·
You
can’t leave them alone for an entire day to fend for themselves
·
Paying
for college? Are you kidding me? Get a job, or be a minority so you can get a
scholarship. Being white is the worst for financial aid
·
They
cry, poop and talk a lot. I already am stuck with me, why would I want a mini
version I have to clean up after?
·
They’ll
have self-esteem issues and I can hardly keep myself above water
·
You
can’t euthanize it if it gets arthritis or turns 14
·
They
can hardly speak English and you have to be a translator to understand what they
are saying
·
Get
kidnapped a lot because the lure of candy is just too much for them
·
Horrible
taste in music and TV shows
Each
have good and bad sides but I guess we can all agree that they are utterly
adorable.
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