Best stuff on Earth

It’s 8:20 in the am-ers and I am sitting at my desk drinking Snapple. Naturally flavored Fruit Punch Snapple. I can honestly say this is only the third time I am drinking this wonderful and sugary beverage. It’s hard to resist agreeing with their slogan Made from the best stuff on earth. If it’s true, I’m going to go ahead and blindly assume that it is made of Jim Carrey movies, French Toast with John, puppies who sleep in your lap, and an all you can eat Chinese Buffet. The best part of Snapple [beside no artificial flavors and no preservatives] is the fun fact you get under the cap. Today’s reads:

 

“Real Fact” #739 [not sure why real fact is in quotes. Makes me question the validity of it now. And holy shit that number is high…on life…made from the best stuff on Earth. Seriously can I get a Snapple sponsor.] I digress, my apologies.

Real Fact #739: You transfer more germs shaking hands than kissing.

I forgot mono is the shaking hands disease. I will agree that shaking hands is a disgusting habit to get into. It’s all formal and filled with gross bacteria. I much prefer the art of high fiving, where uncoordinated people can concentrate really hard for 10 seconds and feel like a champ.

Speaking of champs, my mom is going in for constructive [basically plastic surgery] to repair the skin around her Achilles injury. So everyone please think good thoughts and a speedy recovery for that! On another note, my brother is in love with this website called The Chive. He sent me this link today. He and his friends got onto the site with one of the photos they submitted. Check it out here The Chive- I really do miss college  [it’s #7. He’s the second from the left]. And in other exciting news, I am in the process of adopting a 5 year old Westie named Montana! More to come with that story as it progresses. Back to you reality!