Monday, June 24, 2013

Blazing balls of gas

“I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The proper function of a man is to live, not to exist.” ¾Jack London

I found this quote in a, you guessed it, another self-help book I was reading. This quote hit close to home because I am dealing with this issue a lot right now. Part of me is resisting the reality that I am part of the corporate 9 to 5 world. Another part of me, the free spirit hippie, wants to pack a bag and explore to the edge of the world. I know a happy balance is all that is needed. Life right now is more about getting to a place of financial security before I can start breaking the rules.

And yet…

There’s still a part of me that wants to live this rock star life. Live out of a van because we’re on the road performing. Wants to be in dingy diners at 3am after a show, laughing and drinking another round of Cherry Cokes. Part of me wants that reckless and unbound responsibility. Part of me wants to be a vagabond. Then the part of me that likes a warm bed and a stable environment pulls me back to reality. Maybe it’s the fact that I feel like I’m becoming/am an ADULT. I don’t really have that wiggle room to “test the waters”. If I don’t get my shit together and start laying down roots, that’s when people start talking.


…good thing I’m allergic to cats. Because if I keep going this way, I might end up with a lot of furry roommates. 

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