Probably TMI

So it seems like the perfect start to 2013 to continue the way 2012 ended: sick. This time I ended up in the hospital. I woke up last Friday morning with a pounding pain in my back. Thinking maybe I pulled a muscle, I went to work. Two hours later I was hunched over sobbing and getting driven to the ER.

After a pee test, a few naps and endless waiting, the doctor on call figured I had a really bad muscle spasm. I was relieved. Awesome! Take a day to recover and I’m all set to go! Then we waited more. They kept coming into my little shower curtain protected room and asking if I had taken a urine sample. I kept saying yes. Then I started getting worried.

An hour later the doctor comes back in and tells me it is not a muscle thing, it is in fact a major UTI. Not even little. MAJOR. Got set up with an IV and some antibiotics. Started feeling pretty decent. Got released. Got the drugs. And my stupid ass goes and performs improv that night.

Why?

I was shaking so hard after the gig. Then falling asleep by the venues fireplace. I was starting to get delirious. Then I get home. Thinking sleep makes the most sense, I don’t even bother spending any attention on the pain medication on my counter. The next hour I was violently shaking until my mom found me sitting on the stairs sobbing. I was so dizzy I felt like I had just gotten off a 5 year tilt-a-whirl ride. I couldn’t stop sweating. I couldn’t see straight. My hair was a mess. My mom was screaming at me. I was crying so hard my chest hurt. I took the medication my mom handed me and went to lay down on the couch.

Still upset, worked up and delirious, I began puking. It wouldn’t stop. I didn’t make it to the bathroom. But when I eventually did, I thought I had puked blood. It turned out it was cranberry juice. Thank god. After all that, I sat down and my brother made me a piece of toast and I took more medication. I passed out for the next 15 hours.

Today is Day 5 with this and the pain is finally subsiding. I slept with no pain medication last night and I’m doing okay at the moment. I’m just really sleepy and my bed looks intoxicating. So does the couch. And that chair. And the floor…